I’m kind of stumped as to what to write for my blog(s) this week. See the problem is that I have been on a kid-free vacation since Thursday. My wonderful in-laws came in from Illinois to share the holiday with us. It was great; the turkey was good, the quiet house was even better. See when Nana and Papa come to visit, they get a hotel out in town and take the boys to stay with them for the duration of their trip. Don’t get me wrong, I love my babies to death. But I don’t often get a break from them. Most days I am around them from the time they wake up until the time they go to bed. So a little break every now and then is great. It was amazing, the house stayed almost spotless! I was hoping to get a little more read in my book, The New Strong-Willed Child, but homework was a little more important. I did get a little read on the discipline chapter. Dr. Dobson advises a three step process. 1. Ask nicely. “Adin can you please pick your toys up?” 2. Inform them in a strict tone while slightly gripping their shoulder... “Adin, mommy wants you to pick your toys up right now. Do you understand me?” 3. A firm swat on the bottom. That is considerably different from how we had been doing things. I would always ask Adin about five or six times. And then I would start to get frustrated. And then I would demand that he do as he was told about two or three times. Then he would get a spanking.

“Just as some children are naturally compliant, others seem to be defiant upon exit from the womb. They come into the world smoking a cigar and yelling about the temperature in the delivery room and the incompetence of the nursing staff and they way the doctors are running things…Mothers of strong-willed children know there is something different going on inside, because their babes have been trying to carve their initials on the walls (in-utero)…Three o’clock in the morning is their favorite ‘playtime.’ Later, during toddlerhood, they resist all forms of authority and their greatest delights include ‘painting’ the carpet with Mon’s makeup or trying to flush the cat down the toilet. Their frustrated parents wonder where they went wrong and why their child-rearing experience is so different from what they had expected. They desperately need a little coaching about what to do next” (Dobson, James)

Dobson, James. The New Strong-Willed Child. USA: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc, 2004.

So I was surfing the net, catching some waves when I decided to visit one of my favorite blogs, Rocks in My Dryer. One of the first posts that I came across she was talking about her latest experience to a furniture store. When they were there, her potty-training-in-process child had tinkled on a sofa while they were out furniture shopping. Of course, it was not the sofa that they were thinking about buying, but a more expensive one. Her husband did the honest thing and bought the sofa. I really hope that if I am ever in that situation, I would do the same thing. But having not been there yet, I don’t know. There is that part of me that would just want to throw a pillow over it and leave the store. Quickly. And then, of course, all that I could think of is how when we go bed shopping this weekend, that that is going to be my son. I’m sure of it. And not only will he pee on something, I’m pretty sure that he will make sure that it is the most expensive thing in the store. I might just throw a pillow over it and die. As far as potty training is going around here, we are actually doing pretty good with it. Adin has only taken the baby’s diaper off once since my last post and luckily I caught it before there was any mess. If only I could be that lucky all the time.

Ugh, potty training. Part of me wants to be super lazy and just have my sons in diapers from now until eternity. I know that it sounds a little mean, but hey, give me a break. When we first began this potty training adventure, all was well. I call it an adventure, although at times it is more like a nightmare.

Take the other morning for example. Adin comes up to our bedroom to wake me up. He is naked. I know from this that it is going to be a long day. So I go down to their bedroom and not only is Adin naked, but so is the baby. It's going to be a really long day. Now Adin knows what to do when he has to go to the bathroom, but Arin does not. I'm going to let you all use your imagination as to the state of the crib. I sighed, and grabbed the baby and continued down yet another flight of stairs. When I tried to put clothes on the baby, Adin looks at me and says, "But mommy, Arin wanna pee in the potty!" Ahhhh, I was at a loss for words at first. Then I had to look at my three year old and try and explain to him that the baby does not know how to pee in the potty. I did think that it was kind of sweet though, he wants his baby brother to be like him. But oh, the mess. And of course, it is now a regular thing, if I leave the room, the baby ends up naked. I have even tried to duct taping the babies diaper on him. Seriously. But no, my 3 year old is smarter than that. He immediately figured out how to take the tape off. So now I am clueless as to what to do about Arin and the diaper sitch.

I thought that I might look around the Internet to see if I can find something to help me out. I found many mothers suggesting taping the infants diaper on. (See, it’s not just me.) I was shocked to see people out there actually potty training kids as young as 8 months old. It’s called infant potty training and to me it is just insanity. There a lot of steps to do this. One of the first is to switch to cloth diapers. After you do that, you start just holding your kid over the toilet until they go to the bathroom. When they do eventually go, you make a specific sound or say a specific word. This will help your baby identify what their body is doing. The more I read, the more I learned that this would take a LOT of time. Granted, I am a stay at home mom, but I am also a full time student, wife, housekeeper, teacher, doctor, therapist, you get the point. I barely have time to brush my hair every day, let alone spend a lot of time holding Arin over the toilet waiting for him to pee. “Many families who learn about this method a little late end up potty training two children at once, a baby and a toddler” (Boucke, Laurie). Where in the H-E-double hockey sticks do they get all that extra time?

Adin did do very good today with just big boy underwear on, he only had one accident. But as far as keeping the diaper on the baby? For now, I’m still at a loss. Suggestions would be great… :]

I love to cook, and one of my fondest memories from my childhood is cooking with my family. I remember making cakes and cookies with my Grandma. My favorite part of baking was getting to lick the batter. Since there were four of us kids (me, my two aunts, and my uncle), we split it up. The two oldest ones, (my aunts Kristi and Dolly) got to split licking the bowl, and then us younger ones (myself and my uncle J.D.), each got a beater to lick, which left Grandma with the spoon. I, of course, could not wait to pass this tradition down to my boys. I know that there are a lot of parents out there that do not let their children do this for fear that the kids will get sick because of the raw eggs in it. In fact, one of my good friends and my sister-in-law are like that. But me, nah, that was one of my favorite things, so I wanted to pass it on to my boys. And maybe it is a little reckless of me to do so. My philosophy is that I have been licking cake batter off beaters, spoons and out of bowls for the past 24 years and I’ve never gotten sick, so it’s okay for my kids. Eh, whatever, I eat my steak medium rare too.

Anyways, I decided that even though I have boys, I wanted them in the kitchen with me. I try not to play the gender roll in my house. Yes, my oldest son has a few baby dolls he plays with, and my baby has long curly hair. So I decided to put them in the kitchen early on. My three year old has his own little wooden rolling pin, apron and chef hat. He loves to help do anything in the kitchen that involves helping mommy. His favorite thing is when I make either tortillas or sugar cookies because he gets to sit on the counter with his own ball of dough, rolling it out. It’s kind of funny because his tortillas always come out more round than mine do! Arin likes to help out in the kitchen too. If I am standing at the counter making something, Arin will run into the kitchen saying, “mix, mix” because he wants to stir too. I think that by letting the boys help me out in the kitchen at such a young age will help instill in them a life-long love of cooking. That, and so they will know their way around the kitchen, so one day, they can make mommy dinner! More posts to come on this subject matter later...

"Art helps children grow and develop through creative thinking and feeling." (Spike Dolomite Ward) One of my favorite things to do with my boys is sit down and color with them. It’s great to see how they are moving along with their creative skills and motor skills. If you look at the picture on the right above, you can see that Adin is starting to try and color in the lines. Now I know that he is a long way away from staying in the lines, but it’s still exciting. Just a few months ago, his colorings looked a little more like how Arin’s look now (left above).

Up until a few months ago, I never even thought about doing artwork with my children. Then I was talking to a good friend of mine, who pointed out some wonderful things about art time. She started telling me about how just by letting them color, that is helping to develop the motor skills they will need down the road to write with. Now why didn’t I think of that?! So I thought I’d do a little research and was actually surprised at what all artwork can do for you kids. Spike Dolomite Ward, an artist and children’s art instructor, suggests that it is not necessarily the end product when it comes to art with your children. It is more about the process that they go through while doing the art. It is also a good idea to pick art projects that don’t necessarily have a “right” or “wrong” ending. That way the child doesn’t get discouraged by the end result or feel pressured by the need to have it a certain way. I’ve also tried finger paints with Adin. He has a blast with them, but it was extremely messy. Seeing how it was super messy with him, I don’t think I’m quite ready to try it with the baby. Although we could always finger paint in the bathtub… :)


Ward, Spike Dolomite. "Importance of Art Activities." A Place of Our Own. 2007. 5 Nov 2007 <http://www.aplaceofourown.net/question_detail.php?id=104>.

I just couldn't help but share!

Adin


Arin


The boys and Daddy